Monika Patton

In 2011, I was in your shoes.

During a span of a few months that year, I completely destroyed everything that was important to me. Just as my small business was taking off, I had an identity crisis. If you don’t know who you are or what’s important, it’s easy to make bad choices. I made some whoppers.

I had two affairs. I allowed myself to get swept away by the second guy, buying into his twisted, fairytales. I left my husband, moved out of our house and broke my kids’ hearts. And then my heart got broken in spectacular fashion. When 2012 dawned, I was single, alone and gutted. Three months later, I went on my own version of an Eat-Pray-Love vacation to Hawaii.

Suddenly, I knew what I needed to do –fix myself and reconcile with my husband. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

I had to come to terms with who I had become and work hard to become the person I wanted to be. Individual and couples therapy were integral to this healing. But one thing was missing: a place to talk with other people who could completely empathize with me. A lot of my friends had faded into the background, unsure of how to interact with me.

I was lucky. A few friends did stick around. My family was very supportive. But they didn’t truly understand what was happening. They weren’t going through this. Only I was. I had never felt so lonely.

If you’re lucky, a few friends will stick around – but they can only provide so much support. The Shelter picks up where individual therapy and friends leave off.

I like to describe The Shelter as group therapy for women, though the advice on this site cannot be considered professional medical or psychological advice. I am simply building the support community I wish I had access to in 2011 and 2012.

Please know that no matter how hard it is today, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. My wish for you is to find the right tunnel. With our community’s support, I hope you do.

Welcome – I am so glad you’re here.